the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
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