Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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