Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
Randomize
