The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Randomize
