just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
