i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
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