Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Damn victory sex feels great
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
