I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize