Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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