HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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