i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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