oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
