Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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