When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
