I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize