Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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