Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
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