is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
