I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
