he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
