i permit you to call me
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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