everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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