I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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