My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
bring money and cleavage
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Randomize
