She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
