we're blogging at a bar
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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