if you like me you must not know who I am
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
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