it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
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