maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Randomize
