Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
