brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
