Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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