at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
