My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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