the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
