Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
