I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
