I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
We need to rekindle our bromance
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize