dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize