You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
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