I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
I cut my penus on the lid.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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