I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I still have a little drunk in my system
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
