I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
