She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Randomize
