I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
