well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Randomize
