Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
birth control should be required to get into college
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize