I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
