I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
