kristin has been a bad kristin
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
