My sheets look like a crime scene.
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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